Consolidated Media has sacked its chief reporter for “newsgathering beyond the call of duty.”

Monitoring of Trevor Craven’s WebChip revealed he’d been drinking with a government spokesbot after calling in sick.

The Union of National Journalists has protested “vehemently” against the rewrite star’s dismissal, urging members to work to rule, and lift all their stories off WebTV.

“Craven is a legend,” said the former tabloid editor and pundit, Preston LeRoy. “Every trainee journalist should spend a day of their lives listening to him work the phones.”

Acme Press