Terrorists try to cut China’s fuel supply
Three nutritional activists were killed and another seventeen injured today in clashes with environmental protection contractors.
The militants, who are all believed to be of nominal Britishness, were attempting to destroy crops in East Anglia.
The region is England’s biofuel tank, and the source of almost 20 per cent of the power keeping China’s air transport industry on the rails.
As an incentive to Beijing to continue its programme of support for British banks, agricultural resources have been leased to Chinese state planners for the next 99 years, with an option to extend.
However, anti-Orientalist factions say the use of East Anglia for biofuel crops deprives the British people of their traditional diet, despite the government’s pledge of a GM cow for every living room by 2039.
“We’re deeply sympathetic to the plight of those who are suffering shortages,” said Quinsy Maunder, an official at the British government’s Ministry of Encouragement.
“However, there is not and cannot be any excuse for terrorism. Forcible usage of Chinese property by crop-growing organic extremists is entirely intolerable.”
The detrimented trio of agro-fanatics had brought their fate upon themselves, Mr Maunder insisted.
“We cannot interfere with the airline safety regulations of a sovereign country,” he said.
